In 2006 Meg, a Canadian, and I, Elena - a Russian - crossed half the planet to be together and free.
The journey has never ended. Our escape not only opened up the world for us, it also liberated us from the programming and rituals of society. We, no longer, can live without personal freedom, and we are thrilled to travel the world in search of new adventures and friends.
I believe that not wanting sex - "asexuality" - isn't a newly discovered phenomenon. It's just that social programming in the Western world, in connection with sex (also with not wanting to have children or to partner with someone), is so prominent that people feel awkward if they don't want it.
I translated a fragment of my memoir “Taking to the moon.” I have written it in third person. Natalia’s character is me. Sergey is the man I was forced to date.
This is the second chapter. It describes a clandestine relationship I was in with another woman, in Russia, before I met Meg. (more…)
We have come out of an all too prevalent closet, hidden under the LGBT blanket. It’s taken a number of years, and the common misconception is that because we are two women that want to be together, we are lesbian (homosexual) and in a sexual relationship. The reality is, our relationship isn’t based on sex and it never was, nor was it even a consideration. Although this really doesn’t matter to us, classification seems to be terribly important. It also helps define how we want to be treated by others.
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Any of these, possibly, might have something to do with IRCC's negative decision on Elena's citizenship application: (more…)
Before we met in person in Kiev, in emails to me, Meg told me about a golden ring she had with Roman numerals. It represented time and space: the clock and the compass. To Meg it also represented the potential of attaining the unimaginable. (more…)
First Off: What Happened?
It’s looking like we did everything right: did our time, paid our fees, jumped through the hoops, and they (Immigration Refugees Citizenship Canada) messed up. Probably, on purpose (see The reasons why). We screwed up by assuming that like a normal organization they would see their oversights, fix them, and live up to their end of the contract: give us the service we paid for in full (with our money and years of our finite lives).
Okay, so that didn’t happen. (more…)
Canada has spoken: we are not welcome.
Okay, we get it, and let’s face it, Canada is really not our kind of party scene!
Reality is: we just want to be together, being a family with citizenship in the same country would be a total bonus. Elena’s objective wasn’t to be Canadian, it was to be with me. That’s it. It’s out there. Now you know. All we want is a bit of safety, not to be separated, to be equals, to pursue our dreams, to adventure on our sailboat and see some of the world that denied us landing all those years ago, when we fled for our lives across half this amazing planet.
What Now?
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And that’s it, Meg and I won’t be a Canadian family, because I won’t be Canadian citizen.
We both feel like it is the end of our lives, because for us freedom is part of life, when it’s gone, it is jail. There will be no safety for us, no right to plan our lives, no choices. (more…)
Out there – in Ukraine, in Turkey and in the ocean – it was the two of us. Everything that stood in my way, stood also in Meg’s way. Only it always seemed to me that while all I had to do was to follow Meg’s footsteps, she had it way harder. She came up with, planned and realized an endeavor that layed squarely on her shoulders and which because of it’s complexity and enormousness seemed unachievable. (more…)
There comes a time in every story’s evolution when words are not enough. For us that time is now. We have GOT TO MAKE A MOVIE. (more…)